“I’m trying!” Ileana couldn’t help but laugh a little. She remembered when Lily had been little and the two of them would dive into Ileana’s trunk of clothing and put on a fashion show for Caroleena.

“Stop fidgeting! I swear, you are a horrible mannequin.”

“Ow!”

“I told you!”

“You did that on purpose.”

“Seriously, Aunt Ella, this is my midterm!”

“Shush… don’t call me that here. Who knows who’s listening!”

“Oh, please. The security in this place is tight. No one is going to find out your dirty little secret. Do you have warrants out again?”

“Not in Texas.”

Lily laughed a little. “What for?”

“Nothing important.”

“You know, one of these days you’re going to have to explain to me how you went from my aunt to my cousin… and you haven’t aged a day. I think I look older than you now.”

“Good genes,” Ileana grinned.

“Yeah, my butt. We’re related, remember? Mom’s genes aren’t that good, and I know you’re not from Dad’s side.”

“You’ll find out eventually.”

Lily stood up and stepped back from her subject. Ileana had been standing on a small stool for over an hour, and Lily had been draping various fabrics and pinning them around her. Every time Ileana thought they were done, Lily would get frustrated and start over.

“This just isn’t working,” the young student sighed. “The hem is just too low.”

“Are you kidding? It almost shows my knees!”

Lily gave the older woman a dubious look. “What is this, the 19th century? Knees are in… in fact so are thighs.” She knelt down and started repinning.

“That’s scandalous!”

“Hush, you!” Lily scolded playfully. After a few more pins she stepped back once more. “Wow… you have really nice legs, Auntie.”

“That have no place out in the open.”

“Don’t give me that. Have you ever watched a tennis match?”

“Little whores chasing balls all over a court? No, thank you.”

“I swear, you are so old fashioned. You stick out like a sore thumb around here too.”

“I do?”

“Yuh huh.”

Ileana’s face grew a little dark. “I didn’t realize.”

“Trust me, your clothes are tight, but they’re just too… old fashioned. You can pull ‘em off, but you’d be way hotter in something a little more… I don’t know… post-1920.”

“I’m not going for way hotter or tight.”

“You should. I don’t remember the last time you told Mom or me about a boyfriend. You can’t just coop yourself up with all those books. I know you love reading, but geez, live a little. Get out some.”

“I get out plenty. With those WEIRD kids? Please.”

“What? They’re a very… nice group of people.”

“And not one of them knows how to have a good time. Hell, a couple of ‘em don’t even know how to bathe. Willy’s alright, but that boyfriend of hers is a) clueless and b) taken, and I don’t see you as the man-stealer type.”

“Lily!”

“Oh, but that one guy is cute… what’s his name… the redhead’s brother?”

“Jean?”

“Mmhmm… that’s the one. He’s on the football team, right?”

“Yes.”

“He’s hot,” Lily said, starting to move pins around once more, this time around the neckline.

“It sounds like you’re interested in him.”

“Not me.” She grinned mischievously up at her aunt. “But I bet you could hook ‘em pretty easily.”

“Me? Oh, no, no, no. I don’t think so.”

“Really? That’s funny, ‘cause I could have sworn I heard a rumor about him smoochin’ the new librarian up on the third floor a couple weeks ago… which got her fired.”

For the first time in her life, Ileana was glad she’d been dead for a century, because if not, she would have been beet red. As it was, she blanched a little. “Who told you that?”

“Ah hah! Not a denial! So what’s the scoop?”

Ileana started to cover her face with her hands, but Lily stuck her with a needle again.

“Hold still! And tell me, what’s going on between you two?”

“Absolutely nothing.”

“So you just make out with anybody looking through the literature?”

“We did not make out!”

“But you did smooch.”

Ileana sighed heavily. “Yes, he kissed me, but it wasn’t like that.”

“Umm… he’s not in the drama club, so I won’t believe you were practicing for a play.”

“He was possessed. The spirit in him kissed me, not Jean.”

“Possessed… is that what they’re calling it these days?”

“I’m serious! There’s a spirit in that library.”

“Seriously?”

“Yes, and it isn’t very fond of me now.”

“Dissed it, huh?”

“Dissed?”

“Yeah… you know… rejected?”

Ileana thought for a moment. “Dismissed? Yes, and it wasn’t pleased with the fact. If you’re going to speak English, you really should speak it.”

“Whatever. So is that why you ran screaming out of there?”

“Where do you hear these things?”

“Come on! The new librarian runs screaming out of the library after a football player kisses her, and you think I wouldn’t have heard that?”

“I see your point.”

“Don’t worry. I don’t think anyone knows that the librarian is now the French teacher… and they won’t… as long as you hold still!” She stepped back once more to look at her work.

“No way… this is far too revealing!”

The hem of the dress was half-way up her thigh on the right, and fell almost to her knee on the left. Lily had gotten rid of the sleeves for straps, and the back was almost to Ileana’s waist. The neckline plunged to reveal a healthy amount of cleavage, and a sash wrapped around the waist towards the left.

“Maybe, but you look hot, and I am totally making this for myself. So did y’all talk about it?”

“What?”

“You and Jean… the spirit thing. Did you talk about him kissing you?”

“Why on earth would we?”

“God, you’re dense. He’s hot and he kissed you. Possessed or not, that’s an in!”

“I can’t believe Caroleena raised you.”

“Yeah, right. Like you were innocent at my age. I’ve heard stories.”

“What stories?”

“Mom said you were just like me until something weird happened. Said you were even seeing a gaje.”

“I was not!”

Lily raised an eyebrow at her aunt, obviously not believing her.

“I was not… seeing him. At least not in the context you’re thinking. Besides, he was at least Romanian.”

“Well, that does happen in Romania. Mom said you were a wild child, and that no one could tell you what to do. You wouldn’t study, and you wouldn’t follow the old ways.”

“That isn’t true. I followed the old ways… but I didn’t study. I wish I had.”

“Why?”

“Because someone died for my ignorance.”

Lily’s face fell. That wasn’t what she’d expected to hear.

“If I’d studied when my grandmother had tried to teach me, he’d be alive, and I… I would be better off. A lot of people would be.”

“Is that why you spend all your time with books now?”

“I suppose so.”

Lily thought for a moment and shrugged. “Well, that’s a lousy excuse to hermit away your life like you do. I know you’re miserable alone like this. You need a man… or a woman, you know… whatever you’re into.”

Ileana shook her head. “You drive me nuts.”

“So… do you like chicks? ‘Cause I’m cool with that if you do. I know this cheerleader–”

“No, I like men. I just…”

“You’re scared. I get it. Get over it. What’s the worse that can happen? You get rejected?”

The vampire bit her tongue.

“You just move on.” She picked up her Polaroid and snapped a picture of her creation, waving it in the air to try to speed the process. “So, you never answered my question.”

“What question?”

“About you and Jean! What’s going on between you two?”

“Nothing!”

“Then why is he asking about you?”

Ileana was stunned. “What… what’s he asking?”

Lily shrugged a little. “He and Mic were sitting together the other day eating lunch, and I plopped down with ‘em. He asked me a little more about you.”

“He was trying to make conversation, I’m certain.”

Another shrug followed. “I suppose. You’re better off anyway. He’s way too stupid for you.”

“He is not stupid! He’s a little rash, but he’s far from stupid!”

Lily giggled. “Not interested in ‘em, huh?”

Ileana blanched a little again. How could she have fallen for that? What a rookie mistake! “Lily… even if I were interested in him, it’s not something that could ever happen.”

“Yeah right… not after I show him this,” she answered, handing Ileana the picture.

“Oh God… I look…”

“Fabulous!”

“Like a whore! Lily! You can’t show this to anyone!”

“Relax, I’ll just use it for my assignment. So why couldn’t it happen?”

“He’s a student at the school I’m teaching at. At the very least, I’d get fired.”

“Since when did you care about keeping a job?”

“Since…” She stopped… since she’d met him actually. “Since I’m stuck here in this town until you graduate or go elsewhere.”

“Mmm…”

“You should make sure my face isn’t in the photo. Your fashion professor and I got into it a little bit. If she found out we’re relatives—“

“Yeah yeah, you told me. I’ll take another of the finished product. This is just a design phase.”

Ileana nodded. “So can I get out of this?”

“Yeah, no problem. I know what I’m doing now. So… if Jean asks me if you might be interested?”

“Oh hush!” Ileana said, grabbing a pillow from a chair next to her and throwing it at her niece.

Lily laughed and grabbed another one off the bed, and a pillow fight ensued.

A strong gust blew through the streets, and instinctively she pulled her shawl tighter around her shoulders. In a century her sense of fashion hadn’t changed, nor did it show any signs of beginning to. She missed the days when it was simple to tell women from men by their clothing. Now, there were some it was truly impossible to tell unless they were wearing a skirt… and even then there were some men…

The gypsy found herself lost in thought as she walked through the still busy streets of Blackstone. The moon was shining brightly above, and Ileana was staring into its light before she realized it. Had it been up to her, she would still be in her apartment, crying her eyes out. As it was, it wasn’t up to her though. Nenora had seen to it that Ileana would be miserable just in case she regained control. The demon had apparently been unsatisfied with the cow’s blood Ileana kept and threw it all out, instead choosing to get her meals fresh. So now, after three days, the gypsy had to get a meal, or whoever knocked on her door next may be in danger. The butcher shop on the corner of North and King was the closest one that kept cow’s blood. Since she’d never bothered getting a car, close was good. Plus, the walk gave her time to think about the events of the past few days.

As she approached Starr Ave, the sounds of gothic techno music could be heard inside Diabolique—the premier nightclub in town. Since it was one of only two nightclubs, there wasn’t much competition. That was where it had all begun—a horrible goth club that was far too elitest for her standards that her young niece had decided to party at. She’d met Jean and Luc there that night… It seemed so long ago in a strange sense. Everything had changed so much for her from before… Jean had come to her rescue then as well. And now she’d repaid him with a corpse.

She shook the thoughts away. The doctor had told her not to dwell on the past. “The past cannot be changed, Giselle,” he had said—she’d used Giselle in those days. “We must use the mistakes of our past to forge the triumphs of our future. You have to forgive yourself before anyone else can be expected to forgive you.” Did she really want to be forgiven though? She hated this feeling… this pain in her chest. It made her sick to her stomach. People had died around her before. Hell, she’d killed people before. Never had she felt bad about it though. This time… this time it really felt like it was her fault.

Ileana had crossed Starr and was about to cross to the opposite side of the street to avoid the bar she was approaching when a commotion inside drew her attention. The doors were flung open as a man struggled into the street—assisted somewhat by a bouncer.

“Sleep it off!” the bouncer shouted angrily.

“You want to fight?!” the man shouted back. At least, that’s what Ileana decided he’d said. The man was so drunk and his speech so slurred it was hardly speech at all, but knowing the man, his retort probably involved violence.

As he fumbled in his pockets and pulled out his keys, dropping them before picking them up once more, Ileana sighed heavily—another old habit from life she’d never lost—and ran towards him.

“Jean,” she said gently, slipping his keys away from him as he looked up at her. She’d always been good at palming, and with him this drunk, he’d never notice.

“Ilellana,” the drunken Jean muttered. “What’re you doin’ ‘ere?”

“You called me to come get you, remember?”

“I did?”

“Why else would I be here?”

“Oh… yeah.”

She tried to help him to his feet when the bouncer shouted at them. “Get that drunk out of here!”

Starting to rush, something caught her eyes. The veins in Jean’s arms… her eyes had been drawn to them. The hunger forced it… but they weren’t blue as they should have been. She shot the bouncer a look that would have caused him to cross himself if he were Italian a hundred years earlier. “This drunk,” she spat, “has been poisoned by your establishment.”

The bouncer took a step back, surprised at the venom in the young woman’s voice. “I… we—“

“Aren’t there laws regarding serving alcohol to someone who’s obviously drunk?” The man started stammering a response once more, but she interrupted him. “I’ll deal with you later.” Her face softened once more as she looked back at Jean. “Jean, you have to get into the truck.” She fumbled with the keys, trying to get the vehicle open.

“I don’t… feel so good,” he muttered.

She got the door open and tried to push him up into it. He wasn’t fighting against her, but he wasn’t much help either. His lips were starting to turn blue, and his skin was icy. She had to hurry. He slumped into the seat, and she started to panic. “Jean? Jean!” she said urgently, trying to rouse him. It was no use though. He’d passed out.

Ileana pushed him over into the passenger seat and slid in behind the wheel. How did he do this again? Turn the key… hit the pedal… wait… which pedal? She swore in Romanian under her breath as the car made strange noises, none of which were the engine starting. In fact, she was fairly certain she was doing damage.

“Dammit!!” she yelled, slamming her hands against the steering wheel. She was going to have to call an ambulance and make a fuss. Jean would just have to forgive her for that too.

“Professor?” a timid voice said from the sidewalk. “Are you ok?”

Ileana glanced up to see a young girl from her first class. What was her name… Elise… Elizabeth… “Emily!” The girl was with what appeared to be a date and another couple.

“Do you need some help?”

“Well… yes, actually. Can you drive this vehicle?”

The girl leaned in. “I don’t know how to drive stick.”

Ileana fell, but the other girl spoke up. “I can drive a standard. What’s up?”

“My friend here is,” she took a deep breath. What should she say? “He’s diabetic, and I think he’s gone into shock. I need to get him to the hospital, but I don’t know how to drive.”

The girls both looked immediately alarmed, and the boys looked a little disappointed. “Scoot over, I’ll drive. Mike, can you follow us?” the girl asked of her date.

“Yeah, sure,” he grumbled.

Ileana did as she was asked, and the girl slid into the driver’s seat. A moment later, they were moving towards the hospital. The gypsy kept a close eye on Jean and made sure he was sitting up and still breathing. His pulse was slowing even further, and the blue tinge had surfaced around his eyes as well.

Time slowed to a crawl as they raced the half-mile to the hospital, every moment of it, Ileana fearing the worst. As they arrived, the girl quickly jumped out of the truck and ran inside to get a doctor while Ileana tried to get Jean out. She could have carried him easily if she had Nenora’s strength… but no… she couldn’t. It was too close, too dangerous. Instead she waited for a gurney and tried to warm him up, running her hands up and down his arms as quickly as she could. It was a real pain not generating body heat anymore.

“Isn’t that the running back?” Emily’s date asked as they got out of the car they’d followed in.

Ileana didn’t stick around to explain though. Instead, she ran inside with him, grabbing the doctor’s arm that was taking care of him.

“Miss, I need to—“

“It’s alcohol. He isn’t diabetic,” she said in a hushed voice.

The doctor nodded and looked up at the nurse. “We need to get him hydrated now, and get a dialysis machine in here pronto.” He looked back to her, “Just wait out here. We’ll take care of him.”

Ileana nodded and stood there until the four students came in. “Is he going to be ok?” Emily asked.

Ileana nodded and put on her best fake smile. “Oh yes, it will take more than this to get him down.”

“So was that Jean Rousseau?” Mike asked.

Ileana sighed and nodded. “Please, don’t say anything about this to anyone. Coach Redbeard doesn’t know, and he’d take him off the team if he did. All Jean’s ever wanted to do was play football.”

The kids looked at her strangely. “He’d get kicked off for being diabetic?” the other boy asked.

Ileana nodded. “Redbeard wouldn’t play him unless he had to. He’s very careful with his players.”

“How… how do you know so much about him?” Emily asked, scandal in her mind.

“My family and his go way back. He’s like one of my own brothers.”

The kids all nodded, disappointed they didn’t get their dirt, but Ileana was an excellent liar. The girl who’d driven the truck handed the keys over to Ileana. “I parked it just out front in the visitor’s section. It’s hard to miss. Everything going to be ok?”

“Yes, thank you so much. I’ll find a way to repay you.”

“Don’t worry about it.”

“But uh… you don’t need us now, right?” Mike asked.

“No, thank you. Please, enjoy the rest of your evening. I’m so sorry to have interrupted.”

“Take care of yourself,” Emily said as she led the others back out into the night.

Ileana only had a few more minutes to wait before the doctor came out to speak with her. “He’s going to be alright. He’ll feel like a piece of reused ass when he wakes up, but he’ll wake up. Was this a frat stunt?”

She shook her head. “No, he… he’s a soldier. He lost his unit in Afghanistan, and this last week… he lost someone very dear to him. He just… I didn’t know how bad he was.”

“A soldier? Does he drink like this often?”

“Oh, no. Not like this. This is just… it’s my fault.”

The doctor put his hand on her shoulder. “You shouldn’t blame yourself for this kind of thing. People do horrible things to themselves when they get depressed. The best thing you can do is support him and get him the help he needs.”

She nodded absently. “Can I see him?”

“I need to have a nurse go over a few things with you first. He’ll be out for awhile anyway. You can see him when you’re done.”

Ileana spent the next hour listening to a nurse go on about teenage alcoholism and how it’s the family that can save the victims… the family is the victim… etc, etc. The woman gave her at least two dozen handouts and fliers on symptoms and help programs, including a government run program specifically for soldiers that have come home. Ileana had done her best to pay attention, but she could swear she smelled his blood in the air.

When she was finally allowed in his room, her body fell again. His hair looked awful, and his skin was clammy and pale. There were wires hooked up to him everywhere, and a tube was in his throat to make sure he kept breathing.

“Oh, Jean,” she whispered. “What have I done to you?”

***

She spent the remainder of the night watching him. Well before daybreak he was warm and full of color again, and his veins ran true. When the sun started to peek through the windows, Ileana asked an orderly to draw the curtains for her, and she’d made sure to sit away from any light that was seeping through. She wasn’t going to leave him alone though, and calling Luc would likely just make matters worse.

It was almost noon when he finally woke up. He shook his head and looked around, wincing at the “bright” light. When he saw her sitting next to him, he started a bit. “Where… where am I?”

“You’re in the hospital.”

“What happened?”

“Don’t you remember?”

He shook his head a bit as he started thinking. There was the bar… then the other bar…

“You nearly killed yourself drinking.”

“I didn’t… I didn’t drink that much… did I?”

“You’re lying in a hospital bed.”

Jean once again looked at his surroundings. “I guess… I guess I overdid it some. How… what are you doing here?”

“I was on my way to the store and you came stumbling out of that bar.”

“Oh.” He paused for several moments. “Where’s Luc?”

“I… I haven’t called him. The doctor said you’d be fine, and I didn’t think calling him here would do any good. You can talk to him when you get home.”

Jean just nodded. “Yeah… you’re not… are you going to tell him?”

Ileana just shook her head. “That’s not my business.”

He winced a little as something was dropped in the hallway.

“How do you feel?”

“Like ass.”

“Well, that’s better than the doctor expected. I’ll call the nurse to let her know you’re awake.”

She reached over to hit the call button. “The doctor said that once you were awake, they’d take a blood sample and a urine sample. If everything comes back right, you’ll be allowed to check out.” She nodded to his keys on the bedside table. “Your truck is in the visitor’s section. You’ve already missed most of your classes for the day, so I wouldn’t worry about that.”

“My classes? What time is it?” he asked, looking over at the clock next to his keys. “In the morning? How… how are you here?”

“It was still dark when we got here.”

“Why did you stick around? You’re gonna fry if you try to leave now.”

“I’ll just have to wait until sundown. It isn’t an issue.”

Jean shook his head. “You shouldn’t have stuck around.”

“I’ve been telling myself that for months.”

“That’s not—“

“No,” she said, standing up. “You’re right. I had no place.” She started to leave, but he grabbed her wrist, startling her.

“Ileana…” he started to say something, but it disappeared.

“Just… take care of yourself, Jean.”

His grip faded, and his hand slipped away. She passed the nurse as she went into the hallway. Ileana slipped into the stairwell and went towards the basement, but before she reached it, she fell against the wall and started to cry.

Unfortunately, no grand story ideas were really coming to me. At this point I had a handful of episodes planned for later in the series but I didn’t want to kick them off just yet. So I decided to start flipping through some demon entries online to see if anything jumped out at me. When I stumbled onto Abraxas and saw that his name is where the word, “Abracadabra” came from I knew I was onto something.

so, I had my demon and I even found a great artifact that would be found in the Three of Cups inventory but I still didn’t have a real story idea. Here it was less that 24 hours before the showtime and I had to come up with something. So, I decided to watch some TV and head to bed confident that I’d wake up with a great idea or at least a good excuse for not being able to run the game.

Thankfully, my pillow is my muse for I woke up with a classic idea. Body swap! Abraxas is all about the yin and the yang, a balance between good and evil. I figured what if someone acidentally says the mighty word of Abraxas next to his statue? Why, it would awaken the sleeping god and cause him to stir and desire to break through to Earth for all sorts of nastiness. And what better way to dispose of those who may prevent him from emerging than to put their bodies in other people’s bodies where they’re too busy dealing with the out of body experience than meddling with a god trying to come to Earth.

Of course I had to make it a challenge so I came up with the “Chains of Karma” curse where the bodies the cast were put in all had problems that had to be solved if they ever wanted to return to their own bodies. Oh, and they have 48 hours to fix said problems or it’s the end of the world. Not only did it lead to some hilarious roleplaying but it also gave the cast a sense of urgency that really helped move the story along.

I’m particularly proud of the problems I had in mind for each person. Coach Redbeard, Sherrif Slade and Mother Rousseau are all powerful individuals with serous problems that will make for some great drama. I don’t want to say too much for fear of spoiling the story but lets just say that “I hit it with my axe!” will not be the best solution!

Ileana: in Redbeard’s body to Mac “I am not Red! I am a vampire and I traded bodies with your dad, and I don’t know how, but I’m pretty sure it involves a top hat and a plastic wand!”

Jean: in Slade “Ileana… look, I know it doesn’t sound like me, but I don’t know how it happened, but… I think it might have been that penis I touched.”

Jean: in Slade to Stephanie “I don’t know what happened, I think it was the penis, but I’m in Slade’s body!”

Jean: in Slade to Stephanie “Slade’s in my body! You can’t trust me if you see me!”

Aunt Griselda: “If this is really Jean, tell me something only he and I would know.”
Jean: in Slade, looking around nervously “I wet the bed until I was four.”

Mac: to Ileana & Clem in Redbeard & Ileana “Dad hasn’t eaten babies in years! Dad is a proud member of Babies Anonymous!”

Ileana: in Redbeard “I have this weird feeling… it’s kind of… Oh God… I think I need to pee.”

Ileana: in Redbeard to Mac and Clem in Ileana “You don’t… how do… do guys… I don’t…”
Clem: in Ileana “Just go in there, drop trou’ and let it happen. You know, sometimes it’s hard to stop once you get started.”

Jocks: “Hey, Coach!”
Ileana: in Redbeard doing her best male impersonation “Heeeey.”
Jock: “So what are you doing here, Coach?”
Ileana: in Redbeard “I was just… checking on my… warriors to make sure they’re… studying for finals, so they can play… in the big games coming up.”

Redbeard: in James “When it comes to moochin’ relatives, there’s no magic to stop them.”

Apparently, a group of students has assembled to watch, explore, investigate, research and discover—W.E.I.R.D. They are convinced of supernatural goings on at the school, and, despite the lack of bodily hygiene and sense, they’re right. Interestingly, the red-headed witch—Luc—was among their numbers. His date had dragged him into it. The cowboy was there too. His name is Jean, but he pronounces it John. I haven’t figured out why yet.

My sneaking skills were a little out of practice, so they noticed me sooner than I would have liked. They left the library, but they had been discussing the supernatural in Blackstone, and if I’m going to protect myself—and Lily—I need to know as much about that as possible. Not to mention I need to keep an eye on Luc to be sure he doesn’t start blabbing about me to his friends. The last thing I need is a group of students at Lily’s school trying to stake me. So, I tried to be subtle about following them. After all, the head librarian hadn’t been specific about how long to keep an eye on them. I’m really not cut out for normal work. It’s not in my blood… even before I died it wasn’t. If it weren’t for the librarians I used to work for allowing me to come and go as I pleased, I’d never have held a real job.

As it was, when they arrived at the dorm, there had been a murder. It seemed the WEIRD kids had been friends with the victim—one was his roommate. No one was being allowed in, so I decided to get some information. I started carrying on and crying in Italian—it’s close enough to Spanish—pretending the dead boy was my dear brother… or boyfriend. I don’t think the officer really knew, and I think I might have changed it a few times. At any rate, we were given more information than we should have been, and we followed the ambulance to the hospital. I was allowed to “visit” with the body. His death was obviously supernatural. Murder… I’ve started wondering if the police in town are in the know and somehow involved.

We needed to do some research, but I don’t have the sources or contacts in town. Fortunately, though, Luc keeps a traveling library in several trunks under his bed. As educated as he is, he has absolutely no people skills. I wonder if that’s how I come across… It’s been a long time since I’ve really dealt with anyone outside of my extended family… So, we went to the Rousseau room.

Ironically, Luc, Jean and I were the only ones that could really do any research. Jean it seems, actually knows French, and most of Luc’s tomes are in French. Unfortunately, we didn’t learn what we needed, then several large worms came in through the vents. Jean dispatched them easily—and angrily—enough. We were able to determine that the creature responsible was a Collector. It collects occult knowledge—from books and people’s heads. Unfortunately, we couldn’t find a way to dispatch it.

Peter—the dead boy’s roommate—brought up the head librarian’s collection, and the WEIRD kids decided they’d better check it out. I was certain it was a bad idea, but I wanted to see what she had hidden away. If she is a watcher, it may be best if I just kidnap Lily and get out of town with her sooner rather than later. She’ll forgive me. Better her angry than at the center of the destruction of the world. Then again, I’m not sure if the prophecies about Blackstone are about the literal destruction of the world—which I find unlikely—or simply the bringing of hell to the world. The latter is certainly more plausible as a long-term goal. Demons do love big talk, but they also enjoy existing. With no world, it is rather hard to exist at all. Why bother coming here to begin with in that case?

As it turned out, Peter had an ulterior motive. He started trying to crack the code on the door—apparently for the second time. It wasn’t long before a tall figure in a black robe showed up, and that is never a good sign. I decided prudence was the better part of valor and let Jean deal with things as he saw fit. Not surprisingly, that meant a great deal of violence.

Luc and Jean are part of the Rousseau family incidentally. Not that it saved us from the Collector in a permanent fashion. Luc was able to exert his will on the amulet Peter had stolen from Ms. Kesterson’s private collection. It paused the Collector, but in the end, Ms. Kesterson—the head librarian—found us and demanded the amulet back. Apparently, when he and his dead roommate stole it, they inadvertently released the collector, and neither had the will to control it.

Ms. Kesterson believed me when I told her I’d been keeping an eye on the WEIRD kids for her. I think Jean is smarter than he lets people see. If nothing else, he’s more sensitive. He seemed fairly upset when the other WEIRD kids suggested he didn’t bring anything to the group. However, I think after saving their collective butts, he showed them that he brought exactly what they needed.

Her discomfort was only heightened by the fact that she was looking at 17 women. She hated women. They were so… wicked to each other. There was just something about them… Of course, the other three were men… she didn’t care for them much either. They were frightening brutes… and the way they were looking at her now…

She shook her head and cleared her throat once more. “Je m’appelle Ileana Petru. Vous pouvez m’appeler Mademoiselle Petru ou Prof. Je viens de Roumanie. J’ai…” She paused for a moment… how old did she tell the TA she was? She grinned. “J’ai beaucoup de l’ans.” The students all chuckled just a bit. She sighed, relieved. “Avez-vous des questions?”

One young girl raised her hand. “Do you know where Professor Parker is?”

“No, I’m afraid not.”

“So are you just a sub?” one of the boys asked.

“No, I’ll be finishing the semester with you all. Beyond that I’m not sure.”

“So like… you’ve got a doctorate or something, right?” he continued.

“Several.”

Most of the students gasped at that.

“In what?” another girl asked.

She sighed a bit. She’d taken care to memorize that at least. “My bachelors is in Linguistics. I did my first master’s thesis on language and its influence on pre-Roman societies. My second master’s thesis was a comparative analysis of the development of old French, English and Italian, and the church’s influence on all three. I hold doctorates in literature, linguistics, ancient languages and occult studies.”

“You look, like, 17!” one girl stammered.

A pang hit Ileana in the heart. She had been 17 when she died. Not being able to see her reflection often let her forget how young she was to the outside world… and it let her forget who she had been… what she’d lost. “That’s very kind of you.”

One of the other boys spoke up. “So are you married?”

Again the pain hit her. That was the most precious thing she’d lost—the chance to marry a good man… raise a family.

“That’s none of your business, Steve,” a voice to her left interjected. She glanced over to see Jeff standing nearby. “We’re pretty far behind, and we have a lot of work to do, so I think that’s enough questions for Mademoiselle Petru. Yes?”

The students grudgingly agreed, and the rest of class went normally. Yes, the class could definitely describe what they were wearing to a Frenchman. Asking for the time… that was another story. Ileana returned to her new office and sat down, soaking it all in. What had she gotten herself into? A cleared throat interrupted her thoughts, and she looked up to see Jeff once again, this time standing in her doorway.

“Wanna quit yet?” he smiled.

She smiled back. Overall, he was a rather charming young man. There’d been a time that she would have been interested in him. That was a century ago though. “Not just yet.”

“Sorry they’re so pushy. The guys… well, let’s just say guys in French class use it to get girls.”

“How silly.”

“Huh?”

“French might introduce them, but if they’re buffoons, no amount of poetry will help their cause.”

Jeff chuckled just a little. He obviously wasn’t sure what to make of the woman. “Guess that’s true.”

“Is that why you took French?” she asked plainly. Subtlety was so tiresome sometimes.

He started stammering. “N-no… well… not… it may have started that way, but—”

She giggled a bit. He was definitely cute. “Don’t worry. I learned Sumerian for a man.”

Jeff relaxed, but again, he wasn’t sure what to make of her. Was she serious?

“Did Professor Parker not go over proper titles with the class yet?” she asked.

“Umm… that was the first week.”

She nodded. “I’ll make a quiz then. They’ve obviously forgotten the difference between Mademoiselle and Madame.”

Translations:

Je m’appelle Ileana Petru. My name is Ileana Petru.
Vous pouvez m’appeler Mademoiselle Petru ou Prof. You may call me Miss Petru or Professor.
Je viens de Roumanie. I come from Romania.
J’ai… J’ai beaucoup de l’ans. I am… I am very old.
Avez-vous des questions? Do you have any questions?

At least dear Ezmerelda has given me something fun to play with this time. Jean… her knight in shining armor… or a football uniform at least. He is a tasty thing. The taste of his blood on my lips… that much I remember. There’s so much strength in him. I will make him mine, and then we can be together forever, ruling over this little burg and any other he desires.

Of course, first thing’s first, and oh how Diaz screamed. I really think he rather enjoyed it. A man that gives up sex to live his life hidden in a little church in the middle of nowhere… it was probably the best he’d felt in his entire life. Well, at least that’s what he told me afterwards. I think he’s been lusting after those nuns of his for years, if they hadn’t already been cheating on God. The first thing he did was turn them! You’d think he would have… I don’t know… gotten a hooker? Some people just make strange vampires. Not normal at all… They should wake up this evening, so I’m going to leave Jean another little gift.

I left Jean his first little present last night. I think he liked it, not that he’d ever admit it. His suitemate was so cute… so simple. “Excuse me,” *pants breathlessly* “could I come in just for a few moments? I was just mugged, and I need to sit down before I call the police.” “Why of course, heaving bossom! Come right in!” What a fool. Lean in to say thank you, and then he’s gone… his life slithering its way down my throat to sustain mine. Lust is so beautifully tragic among young, mortal men… but at least he died moaning.

I have to be careful about the way I go about things next. Father Diaz couldn’t be sure if the spells on the church had broken with the others or not, so we thought it best we burn the thing down. When Jean realizes that the only comfort he has here is me, he’ll come on his own.

I want to play with Lily a bit as well before I turn her. Maybe I’ll turn her boyfriend first… what was his name… Mic I think. That’s one of Jean’s friends as well, so all the better. Luc I won’t be able to have much fun with. Who knows what spells he has at his disposal. I’ll need to get him by himself and turn him quickly. He’ll probably want to turn Willy, but I don’t like the idea of a vampire competing with an ancient god or whatever the hell that thing really is. I’ll have to kill her and blame it on Slade or something.

Slade… now he’s an interesting fellow. I’ll have to try and track him down. If he’d follow a master that was intent to destroy him in the end, I may be able to offer him a more pleasant deal. He has the connections in this town—pathetic as that might be—to control it.

I’ll have to deal with that succubus though. I think she has her sights on Jean as well, and I have no intention of sharing. I really am disappointed with Ezmerelda. At least in decades past she’d simply leave things to collapse in on themselves—they’d end up finished—but now… she didn’t even run away properly. She really is a wretched creature. If she had anything going for her at all, it probably wouldn’t be nearly as delicious to wrest control from her.

Deep down, I think she likes it when I’m in control. She can do anything she wants, and she never has to feel guilty about it. She never had that kind of freedom when she was a human. Now she doesn’t even have to look at herself in the mirror! None of that matters anymore though. The necklace is shattered, and no one is going to get that thing back on me! I wonder what Daddy will do when he finds out…

I suppose I’ll find out eventually. I’m hungry. I seem to recall something about take-out in Blackstone…

Ok, so things aren’t as spiffy happy as I first thought. It seems that Jean isn’t on leave—he’s out. He and Susan had their break up a few months ago when he got out—and Mom wouldn’t teach me a hex for her then either. We’re not in Coldspring and Dad’s not on business… well, he may be, who knows. Oh, and Charles isn’t one of Jean’s military buddies, and Stephanie, James and Willy don’t go to school in France with Luc. Oh, and the reason Mom didn’t hide spells from anyone is that they all already know thanks to Luc (he finally did something right). In other words, I’ve been in Blackstone, TX, this whole time, and Mom brain-whammied me.

It was really Thanksgiving though. Apparently, Jean decided to go to school with Luc—bad ass!! I hope he graduates Magna Cum Laude and shoves it in Mom’s face! In a good way that is. I don’t know what exactly happened that Mom brain-spanked me, but it must have been really bad. I’m sure it was something about Jean.

OH! Here’s what’s whack—we’re stuck here!! There’s some spell over the entire freakin’ city that keeps people from leaving, and not even MOM could break it!! I wonder if she really can, but she doesn’t want to forget about Jean and Luc again—which apparently happened while we weren’t here with them—so she opted to stay instead.

So I’m enrolled at Blackstone University with my two big brothers. It’s kind of cool—all of us going to school together. It’s like we’re becoming a real family… I just wish Dad was here. I hope he doesn’t forget us!! That would be AWFUL!

Anywho, Mom is keeping me on a strict schedule because Jean corrupted Luc and now the two of them are saving the world… that makes so much sense. She thinks they’ll corrupt me too. She also made sure to point out that she had no qualms mem-wiping them or their friends if I misbehave. Auntie Griselda picks me up from school every day at three. Man… this really sucks. Oh, and Mom says that if I do well I *might*get an extracurricular next semester. Hellooooo! I’ve been at college a year already, and I have all A’s!! Like I won’t do well. Sheesh.

Calm… I’m enhancing my calm… So they came over to visit, but it wasn’t all social. Apparently Jean sold his soul or something, and there was a bit of a bind, but then that cute woman that he likes so much—OH!! That’s something too!

So I ran into Jean and Luc at school, and I told them what was up with me and whatnot. Then they started telling me the truth about what happened and stuff. Then that woman that came by the house to help them kill that Thanksgiving demon came up. Jean got really sour, and Luc said there were issues… then he snapped at Jean about it!! OMG! It was SO cool! I don’t know what Willy’s done to him, but it’s a good thing. Anyway, there’s something more issue-wise between them than her being a vampire—which she is. Like… I don’t remember the last time I’ve seen Jean that up in knots about a girl, and he really is with her. I don’t know why he doesn’t just ask her out. She *obviously* likes him.

Oh right, so she came over with them to talk turkey with Mom about some business proposal that Willy helped her come up with. I don’t know what’s entailed, but Ileana left with a check to take care of things—including buying back Jean’s soul, and apparently Willy and Charles’s too. Poor Charles… his friend got beheaded.

Oh, and whatever the business plan was, Mom was impressed, and she credited it all to Willy. So kudos there! We started trying to talk. Auntie Griselda had even made cookies for everyone, but Jean made things an issue *really* fast. I know he’s going to be angry with her for awhile… but it would have been nice to just pretend for a little while that everything was ok.

Oh yeah, I am, apparently, allowed supervised visits with my brothers. Yet Mom’s library is strictly off limits. Freakin’ Nazi… I bet they’ve done it… Willy and Luc I mean… or they’re about to. And Jean seriously needs to relax a little. I don’t know any of the specifics, but he is WAY too stressed out. I’d say he needed to get laid, but I’m not sure that would do anything good for him and his vampire girl. I hope he at least tries to talk to Mom without yelling. He *really* hurt her feelings today. He forgets that she loves him whether they agree or not.

Oh well… I’m sure everything will turn out fine in the end. That’s how it’s supposed to work for good people.

So when he didn’t see three vampires about to jump him, I had to warn him.  Let him hate me I suppose.  As long as he’s alive…  At least he has good military training.  Shout for him to watch his six, and he’s ready for action immediately.  It’s really kind of…  Anyway, suppressing the demon inside is harder than I care for.  I’m just too weak.  I can’t help them without her power.  Maybe I shouldn’t be helping them at all.

Luc and Willy had come to find him to tell him that one of Charles’s friends had been decapitated by a grim reaper.  We got back to Willy’s room to plan what we were going to do.  For Jean, that meant taking Charles to get drunk.  For James and Stephanie, it was checking out Ronnie’s (the boy who lost his head) room.  For the rest of us, research.

It didn’t take long to find the information we needed.  Grim reapers aren’t demons, they’re entities that are summoned to collect on a soul contract.  Case closed.  Ronnie shouldn’t have made a deal with a demon.  Of course, that also meant that Jean would be upset he didn’t have something to kill.  On the note of killing, it was hard to resist the temptation to rip out Luc’s throat!  I don’t know how a boy could be so intelligent and so daft at the same time.  What Willy sees in him, I don’t know.

Luc was nervous his family had sold their souls, so he reluctantly called his mother to warn her.  I can’t believe how awkward he was on the phone with her!  I know that Jean has some issues with her, but she’s still their mother.  They should really be ashamed.

Luc called Jean after that and tried to explain things, but he was too drunk.  We went to pick him and Charles up, and that was all we could do for the evening.  As far as I was concerned, the matter was closed.  I walked Willy home so I could talk to her—again Luc was acting like an ass.  I could see how nervous he was about letting us go off alone together.  He doesn’t trust me anymore… if he ever did.

I told Willy about my plan for the Three of Cups, and she almost exploded from excitement.  Apparently business is her minor, so she was more than happy to take on the task of paperwork and legalities.  After that, we went our separate ways.  She was going to meet me after class the next night, but instead decided to show up before class.  She was completely done with the business plan and paperwork already.  WEIRD would have to incorporate into a fraternity basically, but I didn’t see a reason for that to stop us.  As far as I know, none of the kids are in another one right now anyway.  Fraternities generally have more responsibilities on campus though, so that may be problematic, but I suspect it will work out.

Jeff ended up having to take my class once more because Jean, the magnificent fool that he is, sold his soul for a tv.  Well, he did it trying to learn more, but still… I can’t believe he would do something like that!  He of all people knows a soul is too important to risk even in the slightest!  He did at least accomplish his goal though.  The bank was responsible—which meant that Willy and Charles had sold theirs as well when they got financial aid.

I called James to pick us up, and Willy got her carbons before we all went to the hotel room Jean and Luc are staying at.  When I saw Jean there sitting on the couch… I wanted to just… so I slapped him instead.  Willy’s contract made it very clear that we couldn’t kill the demon lender without killing everyone who’d signed a contract, so I suggested we break into the bank and steal the contracts to destroy them.  I was hardly surprised to find that the bank was open when we arrived at half past seven.

So, I signed in to see a banker, and we waited.  Willy and I went in to sit with him with the business plan for the Three of Cups.  She was fairly nervous, but the lender didn’t seem to notice or mind.  He was about to deny the loan when the phone rang.  It was the bank president.  He said that I was a vampire with a soul, so approve the loan.  The lender hung up and happily approved me, and I proceeded to make him nervous by asking too many questions—mainly about how my soul would be harvested.

He pointed me to the president’s office, and that’s when Jean lost his patience.  He saw 6 security guards coming, and he pulled out his axe.  Three went to attack him, and three went to grab me to take me to the president—which was what I had in mind.  If I could at least see who was summoning the reaper, I might be able to figure out how to deal with him.  Unfortunately, I was at a loss when I did see him, and Jean was just about panicked that I was going with them.

The president, on the other hand, was actually almost pleasant.  He wanted to “sweeten the pot” to get me to sign the contract.  I brushed him off completely until he told me he could make me mortal for a full year before he collected.  That caught my attention, but as I pointed out, I was rather fond of my current condition of not being dead.  He was about to propose more when Jean burst into the room, followed closely by Luc and the others.  They quickly dispatched the three security guards—which were all vampires mind you—and I went back to business with the demon.

In the end, we just had to leave.  There was nothing that any of us could offer save our souls, so I went to the only place I knew that could save them—Mireille Rousseau.  She actually seemed genuinely pleased to see her boys, not that they could tell, I’m sure.  I asked to speak with her privately.  Once again, Jean got mad at me.  I don’t think he’ll ever forgive me.

I showed her Willy’s proposal, and she was fairly impressed.  No bank would ever agree to what I was proposing, but she was no bank—she was a mother.  She handed me a check and sent me to the banker with a message.  I knew the Rousseau’s were powerful, but I had no idea…

The ferak demon wasn’t pleased.  He took his money, vowed to get my soul, then disappeared, along with the bank.  I call a WEIRD meeting and tell the kids tomorrow.  We should get started quickly.  We’ll need to take stock of what’s in the store, and get started cleaning it up.  Jean may be her son, but I want to be certain she’s paid back.  I don’t think Jean could be happy if he didn’t.

That demon gave me one thing I didn’t pay for though.  He told me he could make me mortal again, which means it’s possible.  I was so depressed when I was turned, I barely looked… but now… if it’s possible, I know someone who can do it.  All I have to do is find the right spell and not die in the meantime.

That’s when the idea hit me to have a demon banker who specializes in giving out money in exchange for a person’s soul. Of course, such a contract would have to be mired in legalese to hide such a deal but that shouldn’t be hard. Who actually takes the time to read all that complicated lingo, anyways? Since most binding contracts with demon supposedly require blood I contrived a special pen that nicks the signer causing a drop to fall upon the paper when it’s signed. It’s hokey I know but it’s also very Buffyesque.

As for how souls are collected, I decided to go with the classic grim reaper figure. It wouldn’t really be a demon that would be summoned, more of an entity since the grim reaper should be able to appear nearly anywhere. It was also fun expanding the Grim Reaper lore as a creature that is key to retrieving souls when a person’s “time is up” due to some demonic contract. However, in case it came down to the gang having to deal mano y reaper, I decided to borrow a page from Supernatural (the TV series) and say that they can be warded off with special herbs but it was a temporary solution to put off the inevitable if one’s time was truly up.

This was also one of the first episodes where I personally did not have a plan on how the gang would save the day and deal with the tricky contracts that the demon banker possessed. I had them worded where souls would be lost if the issuer of the contracts (the demon) was killed so they couldn’t just knock him off. Of course the contracts were safely secured “somewhere” and he had no incentive to just hand them over. So, after a run in with the banker they decided to go to mommy dearest for assistance. I hadn’t really considered the option but after thinking about it for a bit I came up with a great idea that I don’t want to spoil. Needless to say, mom came through for her boys and their friends but it came with a price that may have them wondering if they came out ahead in the end!